Things I’ve Learned in the Past Three Weeks…

As my regular readers know, I’ve been set up in the Saint John City Market for the past three weeks selling books from our bookstore…this isn’t my first time selling at the Market, but it is the first attempt at being a full-time vendor.  Here’s what I’ve learned so far:

1. Nothing is predictable.  You can have an amazing sales day on Monday, but your sales on Tuesday might suck!  There is no rhyme or reason to it…it completely depends on who walks into the Market that day with money in their pocket and a desire to buy a book.  There was a raging snowstorm outside on one of my best sales days ever…I thought people would be holed up in their houses!  Hopefully, it all evens out at the end of the week (or month!).

2. Listen to other people’s suggestions, within reason.  My friend, Scott, (who is also a Market vendor) suggested I change my display to a U-shape with individual books highlighted in the center instead of two straight rows.  He was right…it looked much more inviting, and gave the illusion of having more books.  Another Market vendor suggested I stick a price tag on the books so people wouldn’t have to look for the price (inside the front cover in pencil)…no way…stickers are death on books!

3. Change is good.  I change my display daily, and bring a new box of stock from the store every morning.  The theme changes weekly.  I learned this from a very successful Market vendor (and good friend), Becky.  There are a bunch of people who go through the Market every day (it’s part of a pedway system)…I want them looking at my stuff when they pass through.

4. Word travels fast.  I mentioned to a couple of other vendors that we used tomato boxes to store our books, and pop flats to mail them in.  Now cardboard and boxes magically appear under my bench!

5. The public can be a little too friendly sometimes.  One day last week, I felt someone looking over my shoulder, turned away from my computer and was nose-to-nose with a little old lady who was staring intently at our bookstore logo on the screen, and giggling like a little girl.  It is cute, but she was certainly old enough to have a sense of other people’s personal space!

Our bookstore logo...guaranteed to make you say "Awww..."

6. Customers usually fit in one of three categories.  The first, buyer, is my favourite!  The second, be-backer, may or may not come back, despite what he or she says (although I have been surprised more than once!).  The third, bugger, will talk your ear off for fifteen minutes and leave without buying anything…if you’re going to tell me about your Great Aunt Martha’s hip surgery, at least reward me for the torture I’ve endured by buying a book!

7. Regulars are the best.  My best customer so far bought seven books the first week, two the second, and one this week (he gets 20% off since he’s bought five books from us).  He walked by my bench at a fast clip on Wednesday muttering, “Stop tempting me…stop tempting me…stop tempting me!”  I got a laugh out of it!

8. My bladder is stronger than I thought.  I’m at the Market from 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m.  I work alone, and the bench across from me is vacant most of the week.  I depend on the kindness of my friends (and fellow vendors) to make pit stops.  My record for “holding my water” so far is seven hours (I usually don’t drink anything during the day, and wait until I get home at night to have tea).  I’m hoping that I get a “neighbour” soon!

9. People are procrastinators.  If I had a nickel for every customer I’ve talked to who’s said, “I’ve seen your store, but I haven’t gone in yet,” I’d have a lot of nickels!  It’s been twelve years, people!  It’s time!

10. Boys will be boys, no matter how old they are.  Last week, a fight nearly broke out in front of my bench because one guy failed to move to one side so that a man coming toward him could get past.  Ridiculous!  Luckily, a woman travelling with one of the men was able to talk him out of his idiocy.

I’m having fun at the Market…I’ve met some interesting people.  I’m going to keep it up as long as I can make a bit of money…

I miss Blogland, but it’s really hard to read and write when one is being constantly interrupted…and I do have to eat.  I’ll try to visit my blogging buddies once in a while, and post when I have a few minutes…

 

Religion, Resolutions, Raccoons, Rutabagas, and Red Tablecloths…

When I last posted, December 21st (sigh), I was deep in the holidaze.  Now that the fog has cleared somewhat (or as much as it ever does for a woman of my advanced years), I decided to post an update with some of the highlights of my last couple of weeks:

Religion:

There’s an Anglican church near Hope’s school that Jim drives by every day when he drops off the kids.  The minister seems to put great thought into the messages he puts on the display board.  This is one of his latest offerings:

Prayers just aren't what they used to be...photo by Jim

I haven’t met the minister, but I think I might like him!

Resolutions:

New Year’s Day has come and gone.  Jim and I hung out at home with the kids on New Year’s Eve…the most exciting thing we did was play Just Dance 3 on the Wii (which I suck at…Jim has a video which he’s keeping if he ever needs to blackmail me!).  I was laughing so hard at my own incompetence, I almost peed my pants (although Jim’s attempt was pretty funny too!).

I don’t do resolutions…I figure there’s no point in deliberately setting oneself up for failure.  Before Christmas, I decided to give up eating chips, and I’m happy to report that I haven’t had any since (I have had cookies, cake, pie, fudge, caramel popcorn, nuts, and candy, though…the weight is falling off at such a speed, you can hardly see it!).

Raccoons:

We’ve had fun the last couple of months watching a local family of raccoons which enjoys helping itself to Jim’s birdseed smorgasbord on the back deck.  The babies love tormenting our dog, Jake, by walking right up to the back door and peering through the glass at him.  Jake goes ballistic, barking frantically, and all three raccoons continue gazing wide-eyed at the crazed canine as if they were touring the Schnoodle exhibit at the museum.

The mother scares me a little.  She’s big, and not nearly as cute as her kids!  Jim and I often fall asleep at night holding hands…one night I dreamed about the mama raccoon.  She was trying to bite me, and I was holding her mouth shut!  Jim woke me up because I was squeezing his hand so hard!

Here’s a picture Anna took of a raccoon last fall:

One of our nightly visitors...photo by Anna Matheson.

Rutabagas:

Last year, I grew rutabagas in my garden…I love them.  Of course this year, the deer chewed the tops of the rutabaga plants…they don’t do well without leaves, so I harvested none.  I was thrilled to see a nice 5 lb. bag of rutabagas at Giant Tiger earlier this week (most stores around here have just turnip, which isn’t the same!).  I bought it immediately.  I had some nice stewing beef in the freezer…I made a gigormous beef stew and told Jim to invite his parents over to help us eat it, because fridge space over the holidays was still at a premium!  If I do say so myself, the stew was delicious, and people seemed to enjoy the homemade rolls and pumpkin pie for dessert too (the pumpkin pie I’d served at Christmas dinner got eaten before I had any)!  I’ve got leftovers for my lunch today…yummy!

Red Tablecloths:

Since my job at the Saint John City Market ended on November 30th, I haven’t been overwhelmed with job offers, so I made a proposal to my dad: I would start setting up at the Market with books full-time.   I would pay the rent, but keep whatever profits I made.  I would finally start taking a salary from the bookstore after almost twelve years of sweat equity!  It would give us more exposure (our location is a little off the beaten path), and allow us to get rid of some excess inventory.  Much to my surprise, Dad agreed with my idea!

I’ve spent this week assembling and packing books to take, and looking for red vinyl tablecloths for my bench…not an easy thing to find right after Christmas (I’m trying to keep with the colour scheme at the Market – benches are painted red)!  Each week, I’m featuring a different theme…next week’s is The Movies.

If you’re in the Market, please stop by and see me.  Even if they don’t buy anything, I’ll be depending on the kindness of friends for my bathroom breaks!

 

And the Winner is…

Two-month-old Nico isn't thrilled to get up close and personal with the Bearded One...

The results have been tabulated for the Santa Photo Caption Contest.  Caryn (mom of Nico) chose the winning caption, submitted by Annie at Six Ring Circus: Lose the beard, fatty. It’s itching my delicate baby skin.  Caryn adds: “I imagine he is saying this in a husky grumpy voice!!!”

Annie will be receiving an angel Christmas tree ornament made from recycled cookie tins by Scott McDade of The Recycling Bin.  She’s flying there as fast as she can (the angel, not Annie!)…her wings are only little!

Annie will have a beautiful angel to hang on her tree next year...photo by Scott McDade

Honourable mention goes to Monica at Monica’s Tangled Web for: And they woke me up and took me out of my comfy bed for this? Sheesh.

and

Jess at Jess Witkins’ Happiness Project for: What did I want for Christmas? To play with my thumbs! But no, instead, I get more Christmas pajamas with the mitten hand arms!!!

Thanks to everyone who entered the contest…I hope all my friends and relatives have an amazing Christmas!  I will leave you with a much more contented picture of little Nico:

"Outfits with ears make me happy!"

‘Twas The Sunday Before Christmas*…

* With apologies to all real poets everywhere…

‘Twas The Sunday Before Christmas…

Twas the Sunday before Christmas, when along Hammond River,
Wendy woke up, and started to shiver.
She stumbled downstairs.  To the furnace she went,
And discovered that the fire was spent.

Jim and Devin were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Starcraft flew through their heads.
Wendy stood in the basement as her fingers turned blue,
“Brianna!” she called.  She’d know what to do!

When on the steps, there arose such a clatter,
Wendy ran from the furnace room to see what was the matter.
It was Brianna, whacking her head with a yelp.
“Walk it off, Bri!” Wendy said. “I need your help!”

Wendy watched as Brianna expertly stacked the wood.
She set it alight and soon, the temperature was good!
They went back upstairs where there was more to be done,
Christmas baking…not even begun!

Wendy filled the canister with more flour,
Knowing she’d have to do it again in an hour.
She mixed Shirley’s Cookies with precision,
As Anna jeered in derision!

“Molasses cookies are gross!” she whined.
“You should make chocolate chip! I’ve made up my mind!”
Wendy continued to work, and sipped from her tea,
And vowed to ignore Anna’s unreasonable plea!

Soon it was time to roll them out flat,
And cut them…the girls could do that!
On to the dinner rolls for the big Christmas feast.
Wendy measured the flour and added the yeast.

She covered the dough so it could rise,
And used her sleeve to wipe dust from her eyes.
Lemon squares were next…a fluffy delight!
Wendy separated three eggs, and did it just right.

The cookies took very little time to cook,
Anna was supposed to be reading a book!
There was an occasional burst from the smoke alarm,
They turned it off…the baking would come to no harm.

Jake hovered at their feet, hoping something would fall.
When he got bored, he’d play with his ball.
Hope was in town visiting her Dad,
Otherwise, there might have been more arguing to be had.

The roll dough was bulging…Anna gave it a punch.
In only an hour, it rose quite a bunch!
An hour later, Wendy hit it again…
Soon, the rolls could be put in the pan!

The cookies were cool…the icing guns loaded.
The dining room table looked like a sprinkle factory exploded!
Anna and Brianna did the decorating thing,
Pausing only occasionally to yell, “More icing!”

The next thing on the agenda was fudge…
Wendy was so tired, she could barely budge!
She measured the sugar and melted the butter,
As she searched for the can opener, she started to mutter…

Opener found…she punched two holes in the tin,
Measured the milk and poured it all in.
Two pots boiling on the stovetop,
Chocolate and brown sugar…Wendy was ready to drop!

At last she was done and the baked goods arrayed,
She snapped pics for the blog, and then put them away.
But I heard her exclaim, as she turned out the light,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

Molasses Cookies before decorating...

 

Dinner Rolls...

 

Lemon Squares...

 

Brown Sugar Fudge...

 

Chocolate Fudge...

 

Cookies Brianna decorated...

 

Cookies Anna decorated...

Smiles, Soup, Santa and Silliness…

Last Wednesday night, Kaylee, Scott and Elise came over so that we could take the annual Christmas family photo.  It was past Elise’s bedtime, and we had a little difficulty getting her to cooperate!  The girls were upset that we hadn’t gotten the Christmas tree up yet…perhaps if they’d cleaned up the living room, it might have happened!  They also vetoed me wearing one of Jim’s Christmas ties!  Here’s the final product, courtesy of Jim and Photoshop:

Christmas Family Photo 2011...Back: Dad, Kaylee, Scott, Elise, Wendy, Jim. Front: Devin holding Jake, Anna, Hope, Brianna. Photo by Jim.

 

I was home nursing my infected toe again on Tuesday (it’s better now)…I happened to glance out the window and saw three deer making themselves at home near the fence to my garden.  I went outside to scare them off.  While I was there, I noticed my forgotten leek plants…four of them…standing in what was left of my ruined garden.  Since leeks are a member of the onion family, deer don’t like them!  I decided it would be a wonderful time to dig them up (the leeks, not the deer!).

Fooled by the balmy temperature (about 50 degrees F.), I was shocked to discover that the leeks did not budge when I pulled on the stalks…the ground was frozen!  Not to be deterred, I went back in the house and grabbed a big kettle of hot water, and retrieved my trusty garden fork from the garage.  I wrestled the kettle down the back steps and poured it on the earth surrounding the plants.  I plunged the sharp tines of the fork in, and began to wiggle the tool back and forth until the leek plants were loosened enough to pull out.  Three big ones and a small one…not bad!

Bucket of leeks, fresh from the garden...

 

I followed instructions from the Internet on how to clean and prepare the leeks, never having done it before!  I also took pictures, which did not turn out because the batteries in the camera were dying…the multiple rechargeables I had purchased were nowhere to be found!  I finally borrowed Anna’s camera to take this photo of the leeks after I cut them up:

Cut leeks in the measuring cup...

 

I ended up with two cups of leeks for my trouble…I decided to make vegetable soup.  Yesterday morning before I left for the bookstore, I cut up onions, carrots and potatoes, and loaded them into the Crock-Pot, along with some herbs, chicken and vegetable bouillion cubes dissolved in hot water.  We had it last night…not bad, but I’m hoping it will gain more flavour after sitting in the fridge overnight (homemade soup is usually better the second day).

This morning, I opened up my Facebook as usual, and was happy to see that my cousin, Caryn and her husband, Jaime, had taken their little boys to see Santa:

Four-year-old Alex is an old pro at this...natural charm!

 

Then, it was two-month-old Nico’s turn:

"Whatchoo talkin' about, Santa?"

 

Now it’s your turn: Come up with a caption for Nico’s visit with Santa.  The person with the winning entry will receive a handmade metal Christmas ornament made by my friend, Scott McDade, from The Recycling Bin (you probably won’t get it in time to use this year, but put it away for next year!).  Deadline for entries is Monday, December 19th.

Win one of these ornaments made from recycled cookie tins! Photo by Scott McDade.

Yes, Virginia…You Can Write a Blog Post About Almost Anything…

Yesterday, I stayed home from the bookstore because I had a sore toe.  And because I could.  When one is not getting any money for working, it’s easy to make the decision not to go to work!

I had noticed on Tuesday that my big toe was a little sore…I attributed it to arthritis, and basically ignored it…just another bonus of being 50!  It was Wednesday night before I actually looked at it…be thankful I have chosen not to gross you out with a photo!

This is how my toe looked...and yes, I really drew this myself! Try to hide your amazement...

The skin around the base of my toenail was puffy and an angry shade of red.  The toe itself looked about 25% bigger than its sister on my left foot…not good!

Then I made the mistake of showing it to Jim, who, sweet as he is, has inherited worrying from his lovely parents!  “That looks awful!” he said.  “If I had a toe that looked like that, I’d be in BIG trouble!”  For those of you who don’t know, Jim is a Type 1 diabetic…it would be a concern for him.  But I’m not diabetic!  “If that doesn’t get better, we’d better take you to the after-hours clinic!”

I basically told him not to worry, and then spent the rest of the night doing just that…sigh…

Thursday morning, I told Jim and my dad that I was staying home because I had a sore toe and wanted to take care of it (I think my exact words to Jim were “You freaked me out about my toe, and now I’m going to stay home and soak it!”).  Dad went to his room and brought out a big bag of epsom salts for me.  He and Anna left for town without me.  Jim drove the rest of the kids to school, and went to work.  I went back to bed and slept for THREE more glorious hours!

I awakened about ten a.m., and went downstairs.  I would make my breakfast (toad in the hole) and cook my rice for supper (I was making chicken fried rice, and needed to cook the rice ahead of time) before I soaked my foot.

I put the rice on, and quickly cooked breakfast, pouring a cup a tea to drink with it.  I went into the back kitchen and retrieved a plastic ice cream bucket (luckily, one of the square ones).  I ran a couple of inches of very hot water into it, and poured in a generous bunch of epsom salts.  I was about to sit down at the computer to eat my breakfast and soak my toe, when I remembered a towel (I always forget that until after I have dunked my foot in the water!).  I grabbed one of Jake’s dog towels from the closet (old ones that are too ratty for public display), and sat down.

I poked my toe carefully into the hot water, and nearly kicked over the bucket because it was so hot!  It was at least ten minutes before it was cool enough…I took the opportunity to Google my condition while I waited…

Looking at the pictures (which I don’t recommend doing while one is eating), it appeared that I was nursing a fungal infection of my toenail.  I vaguely remembered having a problem with the same toe as a teenager in which my toenail actually cracked and part of it fell off!  Could I have been harbouring that same infection for the last 35 years?  Apparently…

Correspondents on the Internet suggested all manner of home remedies including pouring straight bleach on the toe (OWWW!) and applying Vicks Vaporub (it’s fungus, not a chest cold!).  I opted for more traditional methods like epsom salts, anbiotic and hydrocortisone creams instead.

About 2:30, Jim called to see how I was doing.  He also mentioned that Devin’s girlfriend was coming over after school…my “jammy day” turned into a “I’d better have a shower because we’re having company day”!

By the time the kids came home from school, I was clean and wearing clothes at least, having hobbled up the stairs to achieve that!  Dev’s girlfriend, K, appeared not to notice the pains I had gone to, and they went right to Devin’s room and shut the door after the obligatory “Hi” to the parental unit.  It was suppertime before I saw them again.

Note to self…hold out for the “converted” or “parboiled” rice…do not buy the regular “long grain” because you’re too cheap.  My chicken fried rice was way too mushy, and I was disappointed!  Jim ate all of his, but he used to eat ”Minute Rice” and “Sidekicks” before I got hold of him!

After we ate, Jim and Brianna left for town to do some Christmas shopping and pick up Anna at cheerleading practice.  Hope and I watched the premiere of Candy Queen on the PVR (regular readers know I’m addicted to food shows).  I only watched that episode before deciding I wasn’t going to watch any more.  The “Candy Queen” was almost as much of a “princess” as her customers (and I don’t mean that in a good way!), and I didn’t think her work was that wonderful!  We opted to watch a PVR’d American Pickers after that…Dad and I enjoyed that one!

Once Jim and the other girls got home, we watched the Big Bang Theory which was also PVR’d…I don’t know what we’d do without it…love fast forwarding through the commercials!  Leonard confronted one of his childhood bullies, and Penny was exposed as being a bully herself!  Good stuff…bravo to BBT for taking on this important topic!

Before going to bed, I carefully slathered my toe with hydrocortisone cream and wrapped it in three Band-Aids.

This morning when I pulled the Band-Aids off, my toe looked much the same as it had when I’d gone to bed…however, I was happy to see a bit of blood on one of the Band-Aids…at least the medicine would be able to penetrate now.  I soaked it again while I ate my bagel, and rebandaged it.  I wore shoes to the bookstore, but replaced them with sandals once we arrived there…still pretty tender!

Stay tuned for Part 2 of this exciting saga…

How To Clean an 184-Year-Old Building…by the Employees of Cleaners ‘R’ Us

1. Arrive in your company car, which closely resembles a dark blue roller skate.  Remove your vacuum cleaner and cleaning supplies from the trunk.  Slam trunk hard enough to rattle the windows of the building.

2. Trudge up the steps with your burden, and enter the building while complaining loudly to your co-worker about your aching body parts.  Ignore the sign, reading “Please close this door,” on the beautiful curved mahogany front door with leaded glass…you won’t be there long anyway.  Who cares if those people in the bookstore get cold?  The inside door also has leaded glass, and an automatic closer…do nothing to prevent it slamming.  They have that glass at Wal-Mart, don’t they?

3. Stomp up the stairs to the architect’s office.  Vacuum the carpet in the office, making sure to chip paint off the baseboards with the powerhead while making loud thumps.  Slam the office door on your way out.

4. Vacuum the stairway.  It is important never to lift the machine, but bounce it down the stairs, while bashing the powerhead into the wall repeatedly on each step.

5. Make a call on your cell phone.  You’ve worked hard…you deserve a break!  Talk loudly about something important, like what happened on the episode of Jersey Shore you watched last night.  If there are customers in the bookstore, double the volume of your voice.

6. Lift the entrance mat, and heave it out of the way, letting it drop with a thud.  Never stop chatting with your co-worker – she really wants to know the weather for Tuesday!  Using your mop, do a quick run over the tile floor, using the handle as a battering ram on the hall baseboards as you go.  Under no circumstances are you to talk to the people in the bookstore.  They’re readers…everyone knows that readers are dangerous!

7. Wash the windows in the doors, even though the leading makes them hard to see through.  Slam the door every time you come back in.

8.  Clean the bathroom.  Take the bag out of the garbage can, and don’t replace it until you’re ready to leave.  Those people can carry their used paper towels up the hallway to the store and throw them away!  Be sure to throw the door open hard enough to jangle the spring on the doorstop (bonus points for dislodging it from the wall completely)!  Don’t forget to fold the end of the toilet paper into a point!

9. Go back to your car.  Drop vacuum and cleaning supplies back in the trunk.  Slam the trunk and your car doors once again.  Drive away.  Don’t forget to come again next week!

 

Note: This satirical piece is based on my weekly experience with the company employed by the landlord to clean the building our bookstore is in…it is not intended to represent common practice for this or any other cleaner.  However, if I were paying these women, they wouldn’t be employed long!  I miss our old cleaning lady, Joanna, who was lovely…sadly, she left to go back to school!