They Call Me “Typhoid Wendy”…

It’s the story of my life…just when I get to love something, it gets taken away…I’m the kiss of death!

This weekend, one of my favourite live music venues is closing after eight years: The Blue Olive in Saint John, New Brunswick.  The owners have decided to put a new restaurant in the space.  We loved going to shows there because there are very few places for people like us in the city…when I say “people like us,” I mean folks who like to be home by 11 after enjoying a fine evening of entertainment accompanied by a couple of drinks (maximum).  I also enjoy exiting with most of my hearing, unlike other venues populated by somewhat younger patrons, where the thumping of the bass remains in your head like a piledriver until the next morning.  The entertainers who performed at Blue Olive were high-quality acts and reasonably-priced for those of us who have hungry teenagers to feed.  The Blue Olive helped fill the void left by the closures of venues such as Tapps, Melvin’s and Sessions Café, other places I used to hang out in before…it’s all my fault!

Jim and I had one of our first dates there...we saw Lenny Gallant...

Bands have broken up shortly after I’ve discovered them: Madrigal, Modabo, and Vetch…all fine regional acts from the late 90’s and early 2000’s which are now defunct, thanks to my adoration!

Oh, Modabo...Where are you now?

I’ve also been the cause of many restaurant closures in Saint John…sometimes the restaurant didn’t close…they just took my favourite thing off their menu!  Do you remember Wendy’s beautiful thick Chicken Wraps from the late ’90’s?  Gone.  I must have bounced too many chunks of chicken off of Hope’s head as she slept in her Snuggli while I ate lunch there on Saturdays!  Also gone from Wendy’s are their wonderful Spinach Salad and the Mandarin Chicken Salad…why?  I liked them…it’s all my fault!  When was the last time you saw the Mushroom Swiss Burger on their menu?  I killed that one too!  You’d think I’d get special consideration since they named the restaurant after me (sorry…that’s a lie…but Dave Thomas, the guy who started Wendy’s, is a fellow Ohioan)!  I dare not try their Natural-Cut Fries with Sea Salt…

My restaurant let me down...

Every Tuesday at the Saint John City Market, I used to go to Yogel’s for vegetable pie.  One day, they told me they didn’t make it any more…”not enough demand.”  Apparently, a customer travelling on a bus every week from the West Side to get their pie wasn’t enough.  I never ate there again, and sure enough, they closed within six months! 

Other eatery demises I caused were Keystone Kelly’s (club sandwich with sweet potato fries), Boilerworks (California pizza), Café Soha (Flipwiches), D’Amico (spinach salad, thin crust pizza and amaretto chocolate mousse cakes), Ming’s (Chinese food), and Barton’s (chicken burger platter).  I hope nobody finds out I like the spinach salad at Urban Deli or the chicken pesto pizza at Pomodori!  Oh, no…now I’ve done it!

I love their chicken pesto pizza...I mean, it's okay...

 

It happens with TV programs too!  I’ve lost track of the number of sitcoms I’ve killed.  Jenna Elfman rebounded from the end of Dharma and Greg to star in Accidentally on Purpose (cancelled after one season).  David Hyde Pierce of Frasier was a cast member on The Powers That Be, a satire about the First Family in the early ’90’s which had only a 20-episode run.  Before he hit it big in Modern Family, Jesse Tyler Ferguson (Mitchell) was in a smart, funny sitcom called The Class, another one-season wonder.  His “sister” in Modern Family, Julie Bowen, appeared in Ed, one of my favourite defunct dramedies.  [whispering] I love Modern Family!

Jesse and Julie in a scene from "Modern Family"...re-enacting a childhood ice skating routine...

They’ve cancelled dramas I love from every setting…Cop shows: The Commish, The DistrictThird Watch  and Hill Street Blues…War shows: China Beach and Tour of Duty…Hospital shows: Chicago Hope, St. Elsewhere…School shows: The Education of Max Bickford, and Boston Public.  Even my favourite soap opera, Another World, was cancelled!  I love Kyle Chandler…he’s survived two dramas I loved: Homefront, and Early Edition.  I’m afraid to watch him in Friday Night Lights!

Kyle Chandler...I hope he doesn't strike out a third time...

So, to all the fans of the above places, bands, foods, and TV shows, I extend my humble apologies…maybe if I pretend not to care, the things I like will stick around a little longer!

DisclaimerThis is a satirical piece.  I’m pretty sure I’m not responsible for any of these things disappearing.  But I would be really happy to have some of them back!

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41 Comments

Filed under family, food, memories, rants, satire

41 responses to “They Call Me “Typhoid Wendy”…

  1. Yeah, don’t kill Pomodori, we haven’t used our gift card yet! :P

  2. Oh Wendy, please, please, please stay away from the Casey’s gas station in Paynesville, MN and the Paramont Theatre in St. Cloud, MN. They serve the most wonderful Chicken Croissant Sandwich at the gas station and the theatre is where I attend my annual George Mauer Jazz concert.

    Just kidding of course! If you ever happened out our way I’d love to take you to either depending on the season.

    A gas station for a Chicken Croissant sandwich? I know but they are not institutional made but freshly made daily in their kitchen.

    Dean and I love to pick them up and eat picnic style at a local park when we are in Paynesville picking up cars from the transport lot.

  3. Wendy, you and I may share the same curse! You got me thinking about the things I loved that are no longer with us and the list was long. Uh oh. So, for the record I DO NOT like the show Parenthood so NBC please feel free to keep it around.

    Amy

  4. planejaner

    It’s not you, Wendy.
    Really.
    It’s both of us…
    I killed “Ed”, too, and “Dharma and Greg”…several others on your list.

    My husband and I say this, “Uh-oh–we like this! I hope they all know it’s doomed not to make it to next season!” ;)
    jane

  5. Wow. You’re right about Wendy’s! It changes its menu faster than a anywhere else around! Don’t blame yourself. It’s not you, it’s them.

    (As a side note, please take back that whisper about Modern Family, Wendy. If that show goes away, I will cry. And I don’t want to blame you for that. Also, if you haven’t yet seen HBO’s series, In Treatment, please don’t. Because then I’ll have to seek therapy myself.)

    Glad to see you this side of 2011, friend! Happy New Year!

    • I never thought of that, Maura…it’s not me, it’s them! I like that! I’m not sure about Modern Family, really…”Phil” is such a doofus (a lovable, cute doofus)! I’ll be sure to stay away from In Treatment [surreptitiously checking satellite guide]. Wendy

  6. Well, I would tell you the things I like but what if you decide to try them and then they get typhoided? ;-) I can definitely relate to losing the simple pleasures in life. You have a keen memory, no doubt from the awareness of dooming your favorite treats, but I’m sure it will never happen again. Right?

  7. Fun post–Please start liking Justin Bieber!

    PS–I’d forgotten about Hill Street Blues–that was a good one!

  8. Please don’t ever start liking: Glee, Bones, House or Big Bang Theory. Thank you. Amen.

  9. This is a great post, Wendy–laugh out loud funny several times over! You haven’t killed off any blog, have you?

    • Yikes…never thought about that, Kathy!

      I hate to admit it, but at least two of the blogs I used to follow gave up the ghost…one girl gave us the heads-up she was quitting, but the other one just disappeared…here one day, and completely gone the next! Maybe I’ll have to stop being so enthusiastic…your blog, for example…it’s okay, if you like stories about crazy people hitting houses in pseudo-Cadillacs…LOL! Wendy

  10. Hello! I do not believe you have the urge to kill off the TV shows or restaurants you mentioned. But, just in case you do have that special touch….could you really, really ” like” Law and Order SVU. Just asking :) That show is too creepy for me. Very funny post. I am pleased I stopped by.
    Barbara

    • Glad you came over, Barbara…any friend of Nancy’s is a friend of mine! Sorry I can’t help you with that show…I can’t watch it either! Way too upsetting (I’ve pretty much stopped watching crime dramas all together – depressing!). Stop in for tea any time (maybe I can borrow some of Dad’s coffee, if that’s what you prefer)… Wendy

  11. PS. Keep away from Kyle Chandler…He needs to have another show on TV.

  12. This is truly a tragic posting. Just please stay away from my bra. I have a long history of manufacturers ceasing production of a bra shortly after I discover it. BTW, Kyle Chandler might be one of the hottest males ever invented. My husband and I are watching FNL on Netflix and love it. Has it gone off the air??? If so, what a tragedy.

  13. My heart skipped a beat when you mentioned Wendy’s new fries and Modern Family…two of my new favs. Stay away…stay very far away…LOL. Hugs, Diane

  14. Wow. You have quiet a track record. Impressive. I don’t think we have any Wendy’s left at all in Chicago–I’m sure we can’t blame this on you, don’t take it personally. Its just an FYI.

  15. It hurts when a favorite restaurant closes. There was a Cajun place in Lexington, Kentucky, I used to love called Jozo’s Bayou Gumbo. It was local and quick service. You could get a big bowl of jambalya or shrimp etoufee within minutes and get change back on your $5 bill, and then, one day, it was gone. It closed probably 10 years ago, and I still miss it every time we swing through Lexington.

    P.S. You do know they’ve already announced this is Friday Night Lights’ final season, don’t you?

  16. Hippie Cahier

    I really like you, Wendy, but I’m going to have to think about this. It was you who killed Ed?

  17. OMG Wendy!! Are you sure it’s not some kind of record? You know, something that can get you into the Guinness Book? The record for ‘Most closures in all categories of entertainment and media’ or some such, goes to (drum roll please) Ms. Wendy!! ;-)

    I loved Chicago Hope too :(

    Great piece Wendy!
    Hugs, H.

    • Sorry about Chicago Hope, Harsha…that was a really good show! Maybe I could make a career out of this…maybe owners of bad restaurants would pay me to love their competitors (who would inevitably shut down within a year of me singing their praises)…starting work on my new business plan…LOL! Hugs, Wendy

  18. A very funny post!

    I’m like that with skin products. I just discover a wonderful product for my very sensitive skin, and they either stop making it, or “improve” it to the extent that I can no longer use it.

  19. I’m sure some important people in government would love to hone your special power ;)

  20. You’re powerful, I have only taken out one restaurant, but I had to – they made me a pizza with no tomato sauce.

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