Chicken Salad…

Last night, I left the 10th Anniversary at our bookstore at suppertime to go on a sandwich run for my dad and I…here’s what happened:

I arrived at the doughnut chain named for a Canadian hockey player.  There was one guy in line in front of me.

ME: I’ll have a Chicken Salad sandwich on whole wheat, not toasted.

Uniformed Idiot: We’re out of whole wheat…is white okay?

ME: (thinking “My dad is going to kill me!”): I guess so.  And I’ll have a Turkey Bacon Club sandwich.

Uniformed Idiot: On white or whole wheat?

ME: Umm…I’m confused…I thought you said you were out of whole wheat!

Uniformed Idiot (looking annoyed): Well, now I have to make some more…

ME: OK…whole wheat!

At this point the Uniformed Idiot went out back to get the bread.  The Junior Girl left at the counter started making the chicken salad sandwich, on WHITE bread.  She gets it made, and then asks if I WANT it on white bread.

ME: Whole wheat would be awesome (thinking “STUPID!”).  That’s what he wanted.

Junior Girl chucks white bread sandwich in the garbage.

Meanwhile, Uniformed Idiot has returned from the kitchen with six whole wheat buns.  She puts one in the toaster for my Turkey Club.

Uniformed Idiot (to Junior Girl): Did you make the Chicken Salad one?

Junior Girl: She wants it on whole wheat.

There was a HUGE eye roll from Uniformed Idiot. 

ME: (thinking “Yup…I just came here to piss you off, you hairnetted dumbass!”).

Uniformed Idiot makes the Chicken Salad on whole wheat, marks the “Chicken Salad” square on the bag, and brings me the two bags.

Uniformed Idiot: Chicken Salad and Turkey Bacon Club on WHOLE WHEAT.  I marked the Chicken Salad.

ME: (with the biggest fake smile I could muster after ten minutes of stupidity): Thank you so much…have a good night! 

My friend, PlaneJane, would have been proud!


Filed under food, rants

14 responses to “Chicken Salad…

  1. Jim VanWart

    I love Stan Mikita’s Donuts 😉 To bad they can’t get good help!

  2. planejaner

    good for you for taking the high road of graciousness. Not only do we not make asses out of ourselves…but, in the end, we have things to write about. 🙂
    thanks for the link back to the Hell-Mart Post. 🙂
    enjoy your weekend

  3. Wow, Wendy! There’s a tiger in that tank. If I could remove anything in this world, it would be the eye roll. I wonder why he couldn’t go out and get the WW on the 1st request. Don’t answer that. (lazyass comes to mind.)

    Hope you and your dad enjoyed your sandwiches. Were they worth it?


    • Actually, “Uniformed Idiot” was female, and about my age…really surprised! They probably have some stupid policy that they can’t make more until two people ask for it…my ex-husband just commented on Facebook about pulling up to the drive-thru at 8 a.m., and being told they were out of eggs for the breakfast sandwiches!


  4. Tracy


  5. WOW! I bet you really worked up an appetite after all that..I kept thinking while reading this that it sounds like a comedy routine!! Thanks for the chuckle, Wendy.

  6. izziedarling

    I LOVE it when you get snarky, Wendy. You made me laugh 🙂

  7. Pingback: The Jolie Tour, Part 2…Eat, Drink and Be Bitchy… « Herding Cats in Hammond River

  8. LOL this reminds me of when a stoner working at Subway took 45min to make my sub. Very similar experience! Thanks for the laugh!

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