Last night, I left the 10th Anniversary at our bookstore at suppertime to go on a sandwich run for my dad and I…here’s what happened:
I arrived at the doughnut chain named for a Canadian hockey player. There was one guy in line in front of me.
ME: I’ll have a Chicken Salad sandwich on whole wheat, not toasted.
Uniformed Idiot: We’re out of whole wheat…is white okay?
ME: (thinking “My dad is going to kill me!”): I guess so. And I’ll have a Turkey Bacon Club sandwich.
Uniformed Idiot: On white or whole wheat?
ME: Umm…I’m confused…I thought you said you were out of whole wheat!
Uniformed Idiot (looking annoyed): Well, now I have to make some more…
ME: OK…whole wheat!
At this point the Uniformed Idiot went out back to get the bread. The Junior Girl left at the counter started making the chicken salad sandwich, on WHITE bread. She gets it made, and then asks if I WANT it on white bread.
ME: Whole wheat would be awesome (thinking “STUPID!”). That’s what he wanted.
Junior Girl chucks white bread sandwich in the garbage.
Meanwhile, Uniformed Idiot has returned from the kitchen with six whole wheat buns. She puts one in the toaster for my Turkey Club.
Uniformed Idiot (to Junior Girl): Did you make the Chicken Salad one?
Junior Girl: She wants it on whole wheat.
There was a HUGE eye roll from Uniformed Idiot.
ME: (thinking “Yup…I just came here to piss you off, you hairnetted dumbass!”).
Uniformed Idiot makes the Chicken Salad on whole wheat, marks the “Chicken Salad” square on the bag, and brings me the two bags.
Uniformed Idiot: Chicken Salad and Turkey Bacon Club on WHOLE WHEAT. I marked the Chicken Salad.
ME: (with the biggest fake smile I could muster after ten minutes of stupidity): Thank you so much…have a good night!
My friend, PlaneJane, would have been proud! http://planejaner.wordpress.com/2010/08/13/the-angry-samaritan-goes-shopping-in-hell/