From the Stupid Spam File…Installment #1

Update: This piece was Freshly Pressed on October 14th…thanks to the editors at WordPress.com, especially Joy!  I would encourage readers to check out some of my other posts while you’re here!

One of the cool things about having a blog on WordPress.com is that they have a pretty effective spam filter.  You get to see the spam before you send it spinning into the cyber trash barrel with all the other ads for male enhancement drugs, pleas from Nigerian royalty, and urgent requests to check your credit rating!  Occasionally, the spam filter catches material worth saving for later (aging spam vastly improves it!).  I have been archiving these magic bits in a Wordpad file called “stupidspam,” which I am opening today for your reading pleasure:

1. wats up man hows it going .  Fine, dumbass…you’re missing some important letters, as well as some basic punctuation there.

2. Wow! This really is 1 of the most beneficial blogs I’ve ever occur across on this subject. Merely Amazing  (this came from a Chinese furniture/decoration company in response to The Interview ).  Yes, the Internet is full of fictitious pieces about adopting obsolete words, some better than others!  I am astounded at your merely amazing grasp of English!

3. ok how is this supposedto mean?  I’m sorry you didn’t understand the tribute I wrote to my late mother…

4. Some subscribers just don’t get it, like my coworker who couldn’t realize the objective substance of this line on your article “… colour my room would be…I’m really not interested in or good at decorating stuff. However, it would …” this is it, you just crushed it down pal.  I’m happy that my hopelessness at interior decoration has solved all your problems!

5. boom chica wowow.  Yes, I’ve always found Typewriters, Comedic Couples, John Boy, and Roller Skates to be sexually stimulating.

6. i am addicted to farmville.  Really?  I’m extremely fond of potato chips…

7. I bet you wish george bush was still president now.  Nope…I wish he (and his father) had opted for different careers (perhaps ant farming?).

8. Yeah my dad will like this.  Oh, good…I write just for him, and I will sleep better tonight knowing that he enjoyed reading my post!

9. the useful ideas u provided do help my investigation for my group, appreaciate that (this came in response to Random, Rants, Roughage, and Rodents).  I’m always eager to assist support groups for people who don’t get enough roughage.

10. This can be one of the most powerful words I ever learned today, I’m talking about this component of your post “…she finds every bit of lint on my living room rug when she’s here, and tries to eat it!After the …” it makes me to feel more intelligent after understanding it.  I’m ecstatic that my baby granddaughter’s scavenging meals off my floor is increasing your obviously high IQ!

Keep those comments coming, scammers spammers!