Yes, Virginia…You Can Write a Blog Post About Almost Anything…

Yesterday, I stayed home from the bookstore because I had a sore toe.  And because I could.  When one is not getting any money for working, it’s easy to make the decision not to go to work!

I had noticed on Tuesday that my big toe was a little sore…I attributed it to arthritis, and basically ignored it…just another bonus of being 50!  It was Wednesday night before I actually looked at it…be thankful I have chosen not to gross you out with a photo!

This is how my toe looked...and yes, I really drew this myself! Try to hide your amazement...

The skin around the base of my toenail was puffy and an angry shade of red.  The toe itself looked about 25% bigger than its sister on my left foot…not good!

Then I made the mistake of showing it to Jim, who, sweet as he is, has inherited worrying from his lovely parents!  “That looks awful!” he said.  “If I had a toe that looked like that, I’d be in BIG trouble!”  For those of you who don’t know, Jim is a Type 1 diabetic…it would be a concern for him.  But I’m not diabetic!  “If that doesn’t get better, we’d better take you to the after-hours clinic!”

I basically told him not to worry, and then spent the rest of the night doing just that…sigh…

Thursday morning, I told Jim and my dad that I was staying home because I had a sore toe and wanted to take care of it (I think my exact words to Jim were “You freaked me out about my toe, and now I’m going to stay home and soak it!”).  Dad went to his room and brought out a big bag of epsom salts for me.  He and Anna left for town without me.  Jim drove the rest of the kids to school, and went to work.  I went back to bed and slept for THREE more glorious hours!

I awakened about ten a.m., and went downstairs.  I would make my breakfast (toad in the hole) and cook my rice for supper (I was making chicken fried rice, and needed to cook the rice ahead of time) before I soaked my foot.

I put the rice on, and quickly cooked breakfast, pouring a cup a tea to drink with it.  I went into the back kitchen and retrieved a plastic ice cream bucket (luckily, one of the square ones).  I ran a couple of inches of very hot water into it, and poured in a generous bunch of epsom salts.  I was about to sit down at the computer to eat my breakfast and soak my toe, when I remembered a towel (I always forget that until after I have dunked my foot in the water!).  I grabbed one of Jake’s dog towels from the closet (old ones that are too ratty for public display), and sat down.

I poked my toe carefully into the hot water, and nearly kicked over the bucket because it was so hot!  It was at least ten minutes before it was cool enough…I took the opportunity to Google my condition while I waited…

Looking at the pictures (which I don’t recommend doing while one is eating), it appeared that I was nursing a fungal infection of my toenail.  I vaguely remembered having a problem with the same toe as a teenager in which my toenail actually cracked and part of it fell off!  Could I have been harbouring that same infection for the last 35 years?  Apparently…

Correspondents on the Internet suggested all manner of home remedies including pouring straight bleach on the toe (OWWW!) and applying Vicks Vaporub (it’s fungus, not a chest cold!).  I opted for more traditional methods like epsom salts, anbiotic and hydrocortisone creams instead.

About 2:30, Jim called to see how I was doing.  He also mentioned that Devin’s girlfriend was coming over after school…my “jammy day” turned into a “I’d better have a shower because we’re having company day”!

By the time the kids came home from school, I was clean and wearing clothes at least, having hobbled up the stairs to achieve that!  Dev’s girlfriend, K, appeared not to notice the pains I had gone to, and they went right to Devin’s room and shut the door after the obligatory “Hi” to the parental unit.  It was suppertime before I saw them again.

Note to self…hold out for the “converted” or “parboiled” rice…do not buy the regular “long grain” because you’re too cheap.  My chicken fried rice was way too mushy, and I was disappointed!  Jim ate all of his, but he used to eat “Minute Rice” and “Sidekicks” before I got hold of him!

After we ate, Jim and Brianna left for town to do some Christmas shopping and pick up Anna at cheerleading practice.  Hope and I watched the premiere of Candy Queen on the PVR (regular readers know I’m addicted to food shows).  I only watched that episode before deciding I wasn’t going to watch any more.  The “Candy Queen” was almost as much of a “princess” as her customers (and I don’t mean that in a good way!), and I didn’t think her work was that wonderful!  We opted to watch a PVR’d American Pickers after that…Dad and I enjoyed that one!

Once Jim and the other girls got home, we watched the Big Bang Theory which was also PVR’d…I don’t know what we’d do without it…love fast forwarding through the commercials!  Leonard confronted one of his childhood bullies, and Penny was exposed as being a bully herself!  Good stuff…bravo to BBT for taking on this important topic!

Before going to bed, I carefully slathered my toe with hydrocortisone cream and wrapped it in three Band-Aids.

This morning when I pulled the Band-Aids off, my toe looked much the same as it had when I’d gone to bed…however, I was happy to see a bit of blood on one of the Band-Aids…at least the medicine would be able to penetrate now.  I soaked it again while I ate my bagel, and rebandaged it.  I wore shoes to the bookstore, but replaced them with sandals once we arrived there…still pretty tender!

Stay tuned for Part 2 of this exciting saga…


Filed under satire

36 responses to “Yes, Virginia…You Can Write a Blog Post About Almost Anything…

  1. Yikes! Take care of that toe Wendy, doesn’t sound good. So nice to have you back and blogging though!

  2. Healing thoughts coming your way! Sorry you had to take a shower and dress. Jammy days are some of the best days! Congrats on snagging those 3 extra hours in bed, too!

  3. I swear by epsom salts for infections, Wendy. Not sure how it will work of a fungal infection. Here’s to a quick healing.

  4. Ouch Wendy. My doctor recommended the kind of cream for jock itch for my toe under similar circumstances. I think it was Lamisil. Between soaking and applying the cream for a few days it improved and I haven’t had trouble since.

  5. Eeww, Wendy, take care of yourself before that toe gets infected. I don’t know what it is or what to do about it, but I’d consult a doctor if I were you.

  6. Good thing you type with your hands and not with your feet!

  7. Ouch. I broke my toe last year. While barbecuing Jamie Oliver’s chicken. Which I now call Broken Toe Chicken…

  8. I toetally sympathies and hope your toe feels better soon. I love Minute rice and I wouldn’t give it up for love (maybe for money). If your go to pinterest you will find a plethora of wonderful crafts with epson long as you are soaking your toe in might as well craft with it…that is what i always say….

    • Thanks, Katybeth…I’m kind of afraid to go to Pinterest…there’s already too many things online I’m semi-addicted to! Curiosity about what I could make with epsom salt might just drive me there though! Hugs, Wendy

  9. Yikes. That sounds painful, Wendy! Take care, my friend–

  10. jacquelincangro

    Your toe sounds so painful. I always feel that if my feet hurt, for whatever reason, it’s game over. It’s hard to ignore. Hope you feel better soon.
    Also, I do not recommend looking on WebMD. By the time you’re done there, you’ll think you have one foot in the grave. (Ha.)

  11. Sounds awful and I’m sure it looks very gross. I hope it gets better soon!

  12. When you talked about soaking your toe and getting the water on for the rice, I thought you were going in a whole different direction.

    Watch that toe. I’ve got a blog post in the can that will be up one of these days about my husband and his finger that just blew up for no reason. He ended up in the ER and it was quite serious. If you get a fever go in YESTERDAY.

  13. Aaargh, I think my comment didn’t post. Ditto on Murr’s comments!

  14. Wendy! That toe looks like a person wearing a very red scarf! Now I am in suspense! Whassup with the toe?!

  15. What a gripping tale of human suffering and triumph over adversity… NOT!
    Awesome post, Wendy!

  16. I don’t know if I have the stomach for Part 2 of your toe-fungus saga. Not that it isn’t gripping, in a totally disgusting, eewww-invoking way. (hope you’re all better soon:)

  17. Yuck! Hope that toe feels better soon! Toe troubles are never any fun.

  18. I’ll see your one red toe and raise you five purple ones. I slipped on some black ice four days ago and sprained/bruised the top of my foot. But seriously one or five, they all hurt the same. Good luck with yours.

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