They Call Me “Typhoid Wendy”…

It’s the story of my life…just when I get to love something, it gets taken away…I’m the kiss of death!

This weekend, one of my favourite live music venues is closing after eight years: The Blue Olive in Saint John, New Brunswick.  The owners have decided to put a new restaurant in the space.  We loved going to shows there because there are very few places for people like us in the city…when I say “people like us,” I mean folks who like to be home by 11 after enjoying a fine evening of entertainment accompanied by a couple of drinks (maximum).  I also enjoy exiting with most of my hearing, unlike other venues populated by somewhat younger patrons, where the thumping of the bass remains in your head like a piledriver until the next morning.  The entertainers who performed at Blue Olive were high-quality acts and reasonably-priced for those of us who have hungry teenagers to feed.  The Blue Olive helped fill the void left by the closures of venues such as Tapps, Melvin’s and Sessions Café, other places I used to hang out in before…it’s all my fault!

Jim and I had one of our first dates there...we saw Lenny Gallant...

Bands have broken up shortly after I’ve discovered them: Madrigal, Modabo, and Vetch…all fine regional acts from the late 90’s and early 2000’s which are now defunct, thanks to my adoration!

Oh, Modabo...Where are you now?

I’ve also been the cause of many restaurant closures in Saint John…sometimes the restaurant didn’t close…they just took my favourite thing off their menu!  Do you remember Wendy’s beautiful thick Chicken Wraps from the late ’90’s?  Gone.  I must have bounced too many chunks of chicken off of Hope’s head as she slept in her Snuggli while I ate lunch there on Saturdays!  Also gone from Wendy’s are their wonderful Spinach Salad and the Mandarin Chicken Salad…why?  I liked them…it’s all my fault!  When was the last time you saw the Mushroom Swiss Burger on their menu?  I killed that one too!  You’d think I’d get special consideration since they named the restaurant after me (sorry…that’s a lie…but Dave Thomas, the guy who started Wendy’s, is a fellow Ohioan)!  I dare not try their Natural-Cut Fries with Sea Salt…

My restaurant let me down...

Every Tuesday at the Saint John City Market, I used to go to Yogel’s for vegetable pie.  One day, they told me they didn’t make it any more…”not enough demand.”  Apparently, a customer travelling on a bus every week from the West Side to get their pie wasn’t enough.  I never ate there again, and sure enough, they closed within six months! 

Other eatery demises I caused were Keystone Kelly’s (club sandwich with sweet potato fries), Boilerworks (California pizza), Café Soha (Flipwiches), D’Amico (spinach salad, thin crust pizza and amaretto chocolate mousse cakes), Ming’s (Chinese food), and Barton’s (chicken burger platter).  I hope nobody finds out I like the spinach salad at Urban Deli or the chicken pesto pizza at Pomodori!  Oh, no…now I’ve done it!

I love their chicken pesto pizza...I mean, it's okay...

 

It happens with TV programs too!  I’ve lost track of the number of sitcoms I’ve killed.  Jenna Elfman rebounded from the end of Dharma and Greg to star in Accidentally on Purpose (cancelled after one season).  David Hyde Pierce of Frasier was a cast member on The Powers That Be, a satire about the First Family in the early ’90’s which had only a 20-episode run.  Before he hit it big in Modern Family, Jesse Tyler Ferguson (Mitchell) was in a smart, funny sitcom called The Class, another one-season wonder.  His “sister” in Modern Family, Julie Bowen, appeared in Ed, one of my favourite defunct dramedies.  [whispering] I love Modern Family!

Jesse and Julie in a scene from "Modern Family"...re-enacting a childhood ice skating routine...

They’ve cancelled dramas I love from every setting…Cop shows: The Commish, The District, Third Watch  and Hill Street Blues…War shows: China Beach and Tour of Duty…Hospital shows: Chicago Hope, St. Elsewhere…School shows: The Education of Max Bickford, and Boston Public.  Even my favourite soap opera, Another World, was cancelled!  I love Kyle Chandler…he’s survived two dramas I loved: Homefront, and Early Edition.  I’m afraid to watch him in Friday Night Lights!

Kyle Chandler...I hope he doesn't strike out a third time...

So, to all the fans of the above places, bands, foods, and TV shows, I extend my humble apologies…maybe if I pretend not to care, the things I like will stick around a little longer!

Disclaimer:  This is a satirical piece.  I’m pretty sure I’m not responsible for any of these things disappearing.  But I would be really happy to have some of them back!

Waiting for Earl…

Hurricane (or Tropical Storm, hopefully) Earl is scheduled to arrive here early tomorrow morning, and when he gets here, we’ll be ready…

Having spent my early years in Ohio, I have vivid memories of our whole family sitting under a table in the basement waiting for a tornado.  Dad held the staticky transistor radio in his hand as we listened anxiously to the Tornado Warnings being issued.  I remember seeing the sky outside go black at 3 in the afternoon, and seeing hail as big as baseballs!  Luckily, we were never hit with a tornado, but to this day, I am terrified of windstorms!

This transistor looks like ours...

I was never a Girl Scout, so being “prepared” is a state I’m rarely in.  However, since we’ve had lots of advance warning, we decided to do as much as we could to avert potential disaster at our house.

Last night, Jim and I stopped at the grocery store on the way home – we spent almost $150!  Among the essentials were 8 jugs of water, in case the 40-70mm (1 1/2″ to 2 3/4″) of rain we’re supposed to get messes up our well (again, like it did when we got 90mm last year!).  If the power goes out, we’ll break out the Sugar Smacks or the Alpha-Bits we bought.  We also have 4 bags of chips, and about 10 bottles of pop.  If you’re going to die in a storm, you might as well eat what you like…(I did slip some apples, a cantaloupe and a bag of spinach into the cart, though).

We stopped for gas and ice (to keep the pop cold) on the way home. 

After supper, I went out to the garden while Jim put away the lawn furniture (I saw him doing something with bungee cords – I didn’t ask!).  The kids worked together surprisingly well to take down the trampoline.  I picked all the tomatoes that were ready (I’m up to using a BIG mixing bowl now!), and all the beans.  I picked a Red Kuri squash and a Dakota Dessert Squash.  We now have four huge pumpkins about 18″ in diameter.  I wanted to harvest them, but Dad convinced me that the 90kmh (56mph) winds the weatherman is calling for would not send them hurtling across the field (if you see a piece on the 11 o-clock news tomorrow night about “When Pumpkins Kill,” Dad was wrong!).  I sadly said “Goodbye” to the sunflowers…I suspect they will not survive the wind!  I dragged out the hose and watered everything, as I have every night this week.  I rejected Dad’s offer of help putting the hose away…I find that whenever he “helps” me, it just slows me down…

Attack of the Killer Pumpkin...

When I got inside, it was almost 9, and I was exhausted.  Jim talked me into watching an episode of Modern Family (he has the whole first season downloaded).  I asked to see the one where Phil and Jay fly the remote control airplane together…”I was in a plane crash!” (best line ever, spoken by Phil after Jay flies the plane into his face).  After watching half the first episode of a strange sci-fi series called Eureka, I was ready to crash myself…

Phil recovering from the "plane crash"...

We just have to pick up a couple more things tonight, and then…

Bring on the storm!