A grave error has occurred. I didn’t receive my invitation to the Royal Wedding…I can’t imagine what must have happened to it!
Here’s why I should have been invited:
1. I have royal blood (sort of). One of my earliest documented ancestors on my mother’s side, Ralph of Kingsley (his first name was actually spelled differently in Old English), was a deerkeeper for the British Royal Family in the 12th century. Now I try to keep the deer out instead of in!
2. I have a lot of pictures of Prince William’s grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II. I collected stamps from the age of 9…the Queen is featured on stamps from not only Great Britain and Canada, but also dozens of other countries (those Brits get around!). I wish I had more pictures of her on money though…
3. I love British comedy. I grew up watching Monty Python, Fawlty Towers (I do a wicked Sybil impression: “BASIL! BASIL!”), and The Two Ronnies. My Grandad was a Benny Hill fan. Today I love Mr. Bean and The IT Crowd. The Full Monty is still one of my favourite movies.
4. I’m a big fan of Elton John. I’ve loved his music since the early 70s…his song, Levon, is one of my all-time top ten favourite songs.
5. I used to wear hats. I had a lot of hats in the late 70s and early 80s, before I became aware that I looked stupid in them.
6. I once saved the Prince’s mother from a nasty concussion. As a young Broadcast Journalism intern, I covered Prince Charles and Princess Diana’s visit to Ottawa in the summer of 1983. My news director sent me out to try to get some tape of the Princess on her walkabout. I’d never used a boom mike before, and it was swinging rather close to Diana’s head as I struggled to control it in the wind. When the RCMP officer smacked the mike away, I didn’t try again!
7. I laugh at Prince Charles’ jokes. On the same tour of Ottawa, I was pleasantly surprised by how witty the Prince was…I wish I could remember the amusing anecdote he told as he addressed the throngs of people assembled to see him and his wife.
8. My daughter was also nicknamed “Wombat.” Apparently, Prince William’s parents called him by this affectionate nickname…my daughter, Kaylee, is four years younger than William, and I used to refer to her as “wombat” too.
9. I make an awesome shepherd’s pie. The kids beg me to make it for them, even though I’m the world’s slowest potato peeler…hamburger, onions, mashed potatoes, creamed corn…yummy!
10. I love tea. I start every morning with a “cuppa”, and on weekends, might drink 4 or 5 cups a day. I like mine with one milk, two sugar (which is probably sweeter than a proper Brit would like). I am also partial to ice tea, which I drink in the summer time.
I’m sorry to have missed your wedding, Your Highnesses, but Hope has it on the PVR for when I get home tonight…Best wishes for a long and happy life together!