My Rapture To Do List…

Word is that the world is coming to an end tomorrow night at 6 p.m. EDT (which is 7:00 our time…couldn’t it be earlier so I don’t  have to make supper?).  I’ve made a list of things I need to do before then, just in case*:

1. Buy new underwear (sale at Giant Tiger 5/$5 – wonder if they’ll let me buy just one pair?). My mom always told me that when I go somewhere, to be sure I didn’t wear raggy underwear.

2. Finish income tax. Even though I won’t be around to cash the refund cheque, I’ll have the satisfaction of knowing I got it done (3 weeks late…whatever!).

3. Water plants. At least they’ll be able to cling to life for an extra couple of days after I’m gone!

4. Bathe the dog. I wouldn’t want to be stuck in a crowd with a stinky Schnoodle.

5. Take the recycling to the bins. Maybe the next civilization can figure out what to do with my old shampoo bottles!

6. Cancel the newspaper and magazine subscriptions. After tomorrow, I won’t care what our government is up to, and won’t need to know how to knit a toilet paper cozy.

7. Shave my legs. I don’t know what the styles are like where we’re going, but I’m thinking the “Caveman Look” isn’t going to fly.

8. Finish War and Peace. Oh wait, I already did that…maybe I’ll read it again…

9. Beat my buddy, Mike, at online Scrabble…he wins 85% of the time now and I’m not sure if they have Facebook there.

10. Watch a science fiction movie that Jim likes that doesn’t have a hot guy in it, just so I can say that I did.  Normally, I don’t do science fiction…I’m one of the few people on earth who has never seen any of the Star Wars or Star Trek movies in their entirety!  However, I have been known to make the odd exception for movies like Source Code (Jake Gyllenhaal) and Inception (Leonardo DiCaprio).

What’s on your Rapture To Do List?

* This is a satirical piece written for entertainment purposes.  I do not pretend to be an expert on this subject.  If it offends you, I am sorry that you don’t have a better sense of humour…

Reluctant Cheer Mom Tears Up, and Other Random Events…

Here’s what’s been going on around Hammond River the last little while (this stuff is true…not like my recent Mark Twain post!).

1. Regular readers of this blog know that even though three of our four daughters are or have been cheerleaders, I’m not a fan.  Anna’s first competition of the year was Sunday, and her team was so amazing, I actually stopped thinking about how much my butt hurt from sitting on the hard bleachers, and teared up a little!  Here’s Hope and Jake before we left:

Hope and Jake before competition (photo by Jim)...apparently you can tie Jake's ears in a bow...

Anna’s team made callbacks for the first time in five years! I guess those ten hours of practice the week before competition paid off! Here’s the team during the routine:

Harbour View High Cheer team...Anna is the one under the middle red banner (photo by Jim)...

The girls were even better in the callbacks, but ended up fourth (several spectators around us were as shocked as we were…we thought they’d won!). We’ll get them next week!

2.  Jim’s been buying camera equipment on Kijiji to keep up with the girls’ competitions…we met a guy in the Wendy’s parking lot on Monday night to buy a flash meter (Anna’s comment: “That wasn’t sketchy at all!”), and then drove to another guy’s house to pick up a lens.

3.  Monday night, I learned that not having a plunger in each bathroom is a mistake…Hope flushed the toilet in the “kids’ bathroom” and it started overflowing.  I panicked, and it took several minutes for me to turn the shutoff valve off.  By the time I found the “good plunger”, Jim had already used the crappy one to unclog the toilet!  Then I got to wash the mats and the dirty clothes which had been on the floor during the mini-flood.  Note to self…do not put clothing in the dryer with rubber-backed bathmats…little balls of rubber will come off, and permanently attach themselves to very expensive hoodies…

4.  Speaking of sewage, we found out this morning that the lot next to our place has been sold (bad news).  This means that the landlord is redoing the septic field (good news!), but that our yard will be torn up (it will be flatter when it’s finished…good news), and we will lose the lilac trees by our back deck that the birds like to hang out in (bad news).  On the upside, they will be redoing the driveway so that it actually drains instead of a 20-foot puddle forming in front of our garage every spring…the bad news is that the neighbours’ new driveway will be through our front lawn.

5.  Hope made cinnamon muffins, but neglected to read the mixing instructions under the ingredients in the recipe.  They tasted okay, but were rather lumpy and heavy.  She redeemed herself last night with some delicious chocolate chip cookies, which she proclaimed were better than mine!  I actually agree with her this time!

6.  Anna baked chocolate chip muffins, and almost forgot to put in the chocolate chips…she ended up poking them into the individual muffins just before putting them in the oven!

7.  Jim and I went to see the movie Source Code last night while Anna went to a school dance…I’m not usually a sci-fi fan, but I made an exception for the chance to drool over Jake Gyllenhaal.  It was quite good, and had us on the edge of our seats a lot of the time.  While we watched, I ate a couple of Lowney Cherry Marshmallow Creme Eggs…almost as yummy as Jake G.!

Jake with his "Source Code" co-star Michelle Monaghan...photo from tom-samp-journal.blogspot.com

8.  Anna found out this week that a design she submitted for the Drama Fest at her school had been the one chosen for use on posters, brochures and T-shirts!  Her teacher wanted her to submit a short bio to be included in the brochure…I wrote it for her.  We’re very proud of her!

9.  We’re hosting Easter dinner for the family at our house this year…Jim’s parents are serving Easter Breakfast at their church, and his mom says she’ll be too tired to cook.  We’re still on the hunt for a turkey (Kaylee can’t eat ham)…will try to find one tonight.  We also need to clean up our house for company!  I’m looking forward to seeing everybody, especially my “Puddin’ Pop”!

"Oh, dear...how did that get there?" Elise tries fingerpainting for the first time...

10.  I got a Facebook friend request from musician Thom Swift a couple of days ago…I “Liked” his fan page…maybe he read this piece I wrote about his concert last summer…